Last Updated on October 18, 2024
Private Eye Sid “Keywords” Callahan takes on the case of the missing keywords. Can he fill the keyword gap in time?
A keyword gap is the difference between the keywords a website currently ranks for and the relevant keywords it could potentially rank for but doesn’t.
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When analysing the competition, it is always helpful to get a feel for how strongly a certain competitor ranks for your own keyword set. Gap analysis can help you to identify new keywords that you can target. Sistrix.com
Chapter 1: Sid Meets His Client
The sky is heavy with the threat of rain. I look out into the darkening street from my table at the front of the tiny coffee shop. The sounds of the night find me here, as does a lot of unpleasant business. My meet is late.
My coffee is cold, and I signal the waitress for more. The solid surety of my friend comforts me as it weighs down beneath my armpit; hey, these are violent times.
I slide over the half-empty cup as the waitress approaches. This time the boiling liquid makes it into my cup, and not over my sleeve.
I take a long drag from the unfiltered Lucky. My thank you is harsh and raspy. The waitress returns to the counter and I to my vigil.
At 8:15 a young woman enters the place; she is looking around even before she has the door closed. Seeing me, she comes over to my table. From her expression, I know something bad is going to come out of her lips. But I already know what it´s going to be. She sits down.
„Calahan? I´m Joy, I talked with you earlier this afternoon?“
I nod silently.
„You have to help me. I´ve heard that´s what you do well, help people.“
I exhale, looking at her for a long time through the cloud of smoke.
„Yeh“, I reply, „I help people; but that´s not all I do well Miss.“
I wink, and her attitude quickly changes.
„Look, let´s cut the small talk, Ace. Word on the street says you´re my man.“
I stare at her long and hard.
„If this has anything to do with certain missing keywords on a certain lost phone, then the word on the street should have told you that I´m not.“
I prepare to stand up, stubbing out my cigarette and digging in my pocket for some bills.
„Hey!“, she reaches over and grabs my wrist. Her grip is cool and somewhat pleasing. I notice her lipstick for the first time; it‘s red, bright red, as red as the blood I knew I´d be scraping off my hands before this caper was over. I relax in my seat.
„You know about the keywords then?“, she shakes her head and looks at with with big cow eyes; eyes just like Clarabell looks at you with in all those milk ads.
„You don´t get my kind of reputation without keeping your eyes and ears open, Miss.“ I pull out a cigarette and offer her one, but she refuses.
Everyone knew about the keywords. The keyword gap was big news on the street and, it was bad news. From Google to Bing, there are as many stories about this particular little item as there are people you ask. I´ve heard them all. Most concede the keyword gap´s magical properties, in the right hands, but where did it come from?
„So, what do you want me to do Miss?“ I am enjoying this part; the silent ‚negotiation of my fee‘.
„I want you to help me find the missing keyword. It’s on my other phone. I want you to fill the gap. I lost my ranking and if I don´t recover it soon…“ She begins to cry.
I can´t resist restructuring my fee schedule. Tears cost extra.
„Hey, finding a missing URL is one thing, finding a lost keyword – I guess you never backed up? – is going to be a little more costly.“
She shakes her head. „No … look, I´ll pay you whatever you want“, she pulls out her phone and shows me her Stripe account. „See? My client deposited some money into my account.“
I scan the figures. The gal is loaded.
I figure, what the hell, my social calendar isn´t bursting.
„OK“, I rise, „But we go now, you keep quiet, and you do whatever I tell you.“
She nods and grabs her bag.
I toss a fin into the centre of the table, tilt back my hat and dig my hands deep into the folds of my coat pockets. I take them out again so that I can open the door to the street.
Chapter 2: Sid on the Prowl for the Missing Keyword
In the street, I size up my next move. The skirt is right behind, not giving me any clues.
„So, do you want to tell me maybe which way I should go?“, I toss my head to the side, my voice bitingly sarcastic. She looks at me, her eyes getting larger by the second.
„I thought you told me to stay quiet?!“ She almost screams this and then begins shaking. ´OOOOOOEEEEEEOOOOOO…´ a high-pitched whining noise emanates from her.
I turn and my glare silences her.
„That way“, she points up the street towards the railway station.
„Gee, thanks.“ I walk out into the street, checking both ways before doing so.
Another couple is crossing the empty roadway ahead of us. My client is lagging behind, so I hurry her on.
„Would you move your ass?“ I run on ahead. She catches up, the woman ahead of us turning to look at me as though I was something she just scraped off her shoe. The goon on her arm turns too, thinking maybe I´m talking to them.
My client bursts out laughing as we reach the other side of the road.
„Would you mind sharing your joke with me?“ I start up the sidewalk, not looking back.
„That woman thought you were such a jerk for yelling at me back there …“, she gasps as she rushes to catch up with me.
I don´t have time for this.
„Yeah, maybe. She was also maybe thinking what a jerk you are for being with such a jackass as me in the first place.“ She frowns, and I grin widely.
We´re looking all over the place. I know this is pretty ludicrous. The keyword is probably already on the website of any one of the dozens of little speakeasies in town.
The wind is cold on my back. I get another chill when I look back at my client. She is walking with her head down rechecking my steps. The streetlight´s glow betrays her two-toned hair colouring. „I hope this chill ain´t love“ I muse to myself. The first rule in my business is never to fall in love with a client, especially when they’re paying you. Though, the way her black roots merged gently into the brown…
She stops and begins looking frantically here and there.
„What´s up?“ I reach for another smoke.
„I don´t remember if I was on this side of the street or the other.“
Across the street looms the construction site. The light of the moon reflected jutting steel girders and barbed wire. There is a musty, earthy smell in the air from the open pit beyond the hurriedly erected fencing. I put two and two together; as usual, they still made four.
„You mean you could have been anywhere in the area?“ I look at her in disbelief. She´s been playing me for a patsy the whole time.
„I think I crossed somewhere along here.“, she responds sheepishly.
„Look Miss, I´m a busy guy. How did you cross?“ I attempt to work out some sort of trajectory through which the keyword might have fallen.
„Oh I don´t know, I think I sort of ran this part, then skipped into the middle of the road, and then did a back-and-forth sort of jig thing before coming to the side here.´
She´s in the middle of the road parodying the movements like some crazed marionette suddenly cut loose from its strings. I follow slowly, savouring the movements of her body.
Suddenly at the edge of the construction site, I hear voices coming towards us.
Chapter 3: Sid Fills the Keyword Gap
With cat-like speed, I push my client into the mud and roll into a crouch, catching myself in the head on a large two-by-four. Dazed, but still in action, my hand instinctively moves to my holster as I search the area for trouble. Across the street, a couple of kids walk by oblivious to our presence. I relax.
Behind me, my client is coughing on a mouthful of mud, and scraping clean her outfit.
„What the hell are you DOING?!“ she screeches.
„Hey“, I look at her with weather-worn eyes, „You wanted to tag along. You´re lucky I didn´t accidentally shoot you.“
I force calm on myself. This job is making me jumpy. Suddenly I get this feeling, I don´t know how to explain it, kind of that feeling when you install a plugin but you don´t have time to try to test it first, and you just know that it’s going to require you to upgrade before it works properly.
My gut bunches into a fist, and I push past my client. She slips and tumbles into a large puddle. I walk over to a pile of dirt at the side of the road. On top of the dirt is a phone. It´s a little worse for wear, but the beam of my flashlight makes it twinkle merrily. I pick it up and wipe the grime off on my sleeve. I pass it over to my client, who has just caught up with me.
„This yours?“ I grin and reach for a smoke, confidence oozing out of my shoes.
„Yes!“ She throws her arms about my neck and screams with joy. I back off. I know all about clients. One minute they´re all over you, the next they´re scratching your eyes out for setting their new website to ‚no index‘.
She taps the screen, adds the keyword to her website, and instantly ranks above Forbes for ‚best cat sock styles for Christmas‘. The keyword gap is filled. She counts out the crisp bills that are my fee and hands them to me.
I raise an eyebrow. “No Stripe transfer?”
She shakes her head. “That was a burner account. I’m strictly a cash kind of girl.” She winks, and waves as she walks away. “No trail, no jail, Callahan!”
Another job done, another night the city sleeps in peace. A light rain begins to fall, rustling the thick canopy of leaves above my head. The park is deserted at this hour, but I like it that way. I knock back a shot from my flask, feeling good. I hope Joy keeps her keywords tightly around her content in the future; next time I might not be there, might not be so easy to find, the world not so easy to save.
I flick my cigarette into the wet grass and hurry home.
Thanks for the article image: Photo by cottonbro studio: https://www.pexels.com/photo/photo-of-man-wearing-beige-trench-coat-7299456/