ecommerce christmas 2019



A Ver’ eCommerce Christmas

Happ-eCommerce to all, and to all a good night!

‘Twas days before Christmas, but all through the classroom,
My students were working, both local and via zoom.
Mailchimp campaigns were crafted with care,
In hopes that their grades soon would be there.

Designers were nestled all snug by their screens,
While visions of Photoshop danced in their dreams.
IT students in the kitchen, loading up on snacks,
I had just settled down, my laptop to unpack.

When out of the network there arose such a clatter,
I jumped to my phone to see what was the matter.
To a browser my fingers they flew like a flash,
My screen blipped and it shook, it started to crash!

I gasped at the thought and started to grouse,
Then turned to my student and clicked on their mouse.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
A 404 page filled with reindeer.

When the image resolved, so bright and so quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick!
More rapid than elections, red pixels they came,
He looked out from my screen, and put us to shame;

“Now you there! Yes you!”, my speaker did reel;
“Get working! Get working!” He started to squeal!
“Jump onto your keyboard, let go of that cup!
There’ll be coffee for all when the website is up!”

The screen gave a flicker, I feared some new spam,
Then into the classroom rose a VR hologram!
He was dressed in all red, from his head to his shoes,
Which were black like the hairs which sprung from his nose.

He pulled out the flash drives he had stored in his pack,
The elf looked like a hacker, just raring to hack!
His eyes, how they twinkled! His cheeks, they did glow!
He threw off his gloves, and was ready to go!

With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head,
Santa soon let me know I had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, gave his phone a quick poke,
Then mirrored our servers with only a stroke!

He defragged the hard drives, he added a Vim,
Then threw in some apps, just on a whim!
He worked without noise, his fingers they flew,
Upgrading our Adwords as only he knew!

He updated our chatbots, installed Visual.lay
He remodeled our SEMrush, Traackr, and SWAY!
My eyes widened a bit, he had not a scruple,
As he then added an auto-Update to the ol’ Drupal!!

The drives gave a whirl as if they were pleased,
St. Nick coyly smiled, then let out a great sneeze.
Wiping the snuff from the end of his nose,
In a wink he became pixels and fell at my toes.

He flew back thru the screen, zoosh! white, red, and pink,
Back through the ethernet with barely a blink.
But I heard him exclaim as he passed from my sight,
“Happ-eCommerce to all, and to all a good night!”

A Visit from St. Nicholas BY CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE