‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the office,
Programmers were working, their coding was flawless.
Scrum notes were stacked on the tablets with care,
In hopes that The Client soon would be there.
Designers were nestled all snug by their screens,
While visions of InDesign danced in their dreams.
My team on the sofa and me with a snack,
Had just settled down, thank-you gifts to unpack.
When from my desk there arose such a clatter,
I jumped to the web to see what was the matter.
To a browser my fingers they flew like a flash,
My Samsung blipped and it shook. It started to crash!
I gasped at the thought and started to grouse,
Then turned to my laptop and clicked on the mouse.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
A redirect page that at first was not clear.
When the image resolved, so bright and so quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick!
More rapid than Bitcoin, more graphics they came,
He looked out from my screen, and called us by name;
“Now Freddie! Now Katrin!”, my speaker did reel;
“On Warren! On Joergi!” He started to squeal!
“Jump onto the keyboard, let go of that slice!
There’ll be pizza for all if they’re naughty OR nice!”
The screen gave a flicker, I feared some new spam,
Then into my office rose a VR hologram!
He was dressed in all red, from his head to his shoes,
Which were black like the hairs which sprung from his nose.
He pulled out the flash drives he had stored in his pack,
The elf looked like a hacker, just raring to hack!
His eyes, how they twinkled! His cheeks, they did glow!
Santa, it seemed, had drunk our Barolo!!
With a wink of his eye and a nod of his head,
Santa soon let us know we had nothing to dread.
He spoke not a word, gave my phone a quick poke,
He mirrored our server with only a stroke!
He defragged the hard drives, he added a Vim,
Then threw in some apps, just on a whim!
He worked without noise, his fingers they flew!
He then upgraded our OS, before we knew!
He updated our Email, Adobe, and Plex,
He remodeled Scribbler, Handbrake, KeePass!
My eyes widened a bit, he had not a scruple,
As he added an auto-update to our Drupal!!
The drive gave a whirl as if it were pleased,
St. Nick coyly smiled, then let out a great sneeze.
Wiping the snuff from the end of his nose,
Santa became pixels and fell at our toes.
He flew back thru the screen, zoosh! white, red, and pink,
Back through the ethernet with barely a blink.
But we heard him exclaim as he passed from our sight,
“Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!”
A Visit from St. Nicholas BY CLEMENT CLARKE MOORE